Saturday Super Spam Bonanza

Yes, I know it's technically still Friday but in the hearts of many it most certainly is the weekend. To celebrate, here's a collection of dumb spam comments recently left on the Illarterate Blog.

"Howdy definitely have yourself a good looking website here Only part about it I don’t care for is all of the worthless comments" ~ Article Marketing Robot

How very self-referential. Excellent, I love spammers with a sense of humour!

"Does one suffer from unwanted weight?" ~ Something to do with catering

Is one suggesting I am fat? How very dare you! You are hereby banned from the Internet, lardass.

"The next time I read a blog, I hope that it doesnt disappoint me as much as this one. I mean, I know it was my choice to read, but I actually thought youd have something interesting to say. All I hear is a bunch of whining about something that you could fix if you werent too busy looking for attention." ~ Glass fish tanks

If I were a bit more insecure or stupid enough to take spam comments seriously I'd probably have destroyed my keyboard by now. Also, glass fish tanks? Are there any other types? Do they use polypropylene or that stuff fairground goldfish come in?

"Sounds like a great product. It would probably be a great gift for grandma at Christmas time" ~ NHL Scores

Found on a post about Illogicopedia, which I have been gifting to my relatives for many years now. Funny how they never come round to visit any more.

"Thank. It makes me feel great when I read all these stories. It helps me from hopelessness and make me more stronger to fly… thank… for everything. Love" ~ Happy Birthday Song

Can these usernames get even more irrelevant? And how do my blog posts help you overcome your fear of flying? Unless you're a bird or competitor in the Red Bull Air Race, in which case I don't see why you'd waste your time on a site such as mine. Thank.

"Hi, i just wanted to come here to let you know about a super cheap service that posts comments such as this on millions of WordPress blogs. Why you may ask, well you may want to sell a product and target webmasters or simply just increase the amount of backlinks your website has which will improve your Google rankins which will then bring your web site much more visitors and money. Take a fast look at this website for more information." ~ Anonymous

Join the spam revolution today for a quick buck, fools!

"This is a superb post                 .But I was wondering how do I suscribe to the RSS feed?" ~ Gossip News Celebrity

Fell asleep on the space bar halfway through the post? Never mind, because re-rreading y0ur own commments is fir loosers.

Quickies

"Happy New Year!" ~ Asdffdsa (posted on 24 January)

"Great post Jeff." ~ The Pogues (Erm, cheers Dave)

"That was a awesome read." ~ Google Earth Live (Stay in school, kids, to avoid posting stuff like this yourself)

The worst part of all this? The fact I've only scratched the surface of the 500+ spam comments placed in my Askimet queue in the past week. I got about 100 comments in and lost the will to move or keep my eyes open, in fact I had to slap myself with a frozen haddock to revitalise myself to complete this post.